Hello Diplomats! Welcome to our world!!!!

Hello, Hello, Mr. Diplomat! Welcome to Iraq--you know that place that we happened to have 150,000+ soldiers fighting for something they may or may not believe in....yes! that one...welcome!

Yes, the war that has been going on for the past 4 years “over there” (Iraq, here for me) so you won’t have to fight it—or care about it—“over here” (the U.S.) has finally caught up with you. I have to say that out of the many decisions made by the administration this one really tickled my belly and made me smile...thank you, thank you. This is the situation, in a nutshell; the civilian jobs at the Iraq embassy and the green zone have been filled by volunteer diplomats from DC. Now, after experiencing a shortage of volunteers to fill the positions here in Iraq, the Secretary of State—Condolezza Rice—has announced that the positions leftover after volunteers are accepted were going be fulfilled by other “selectees”—in a non-voluntary manner. Oh my goodness!!! The diplomats are outraged!!! Who will raise their children if there are dead or wounded? I can tell you who….

Your children can be raised by the same kind of people that are raising thousands of children in the United States of America whom have lost their mother or father in this war. That’s who!!! How dare some paper pusher to speak of the worthiness of his life as if it is much more relevant and cherished than that of our American Soldiers, Marines, Sailors and Airmen. Anyone who knows me well can imagine the choice of words I have for these people but I will refrain from the profanity in this blog…

To make their ignorance more apparent, they preceded the previous query with: “It is one thing if someone believes in what is going on over there and volunteers, […] but it is another thing to send someone over there on a forced assignment. And I'm sorry, but basically that is a potential death sentence and you know it. […]”

Bravo! What a brilliant deduction, too bad that it really does not apply to those that are working for the government and—as the soldiers do—have promise to defend the nation and be loyal to it, therefore,…you can assume that you have volunteered just like all the service members that have sworn to protect the constitution and defend our nation agreeing or disagreeing, believing or doubting…feel our pain Mr. Diplomat and welcome to our world.

This is the problem with this war…people in the U.S. are too focused on Britney Spears, Lindsey Lohan and who was kick out of Dancing with the Stars. Our society has inferred that prancing around a stage is more prestigious and important than to be of service of your country or at least have the responsibility to serve society with something of substance and not only for entertainment. What is wrong with us? Who talks about the soldiers that are sacrificing their lives? Who cares? Who carries the burden of this war?

People do not hear about the soldiers that have died and they sure do not know the aftermath of their death. They do not know what the families go through, how they cope—if they do—with the loss of a key member of their family. People just do not know and it does not seem like they care. Diplomats in the white house care about the uncertain future of their families but for the past four years thought that it was suitable for the military families to undergo the risk.

It is about time that the war starts to reach home for some people. I do not think that it is fair for my children to have to deal with the absence of their mother while some able men or women carry on their support for the war from their living room chair. If we are all in this together, then we have to all be in it! Say it like it is; these are the sacrifices of the few so the many can enjoy life as if freedom is free. …Talk about phonies

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A little less about work, a little more about me...

Before I continue with my tantrum about my job, I want to let you in some of the things I have been reflecting on lately. During the last few months I have realized that I am not the social butterfly I thought I was. I suddenly recognize that I am nicer than I thought I was and that I have developed an annoying habit of pleasing people even against my instinct because I do not want to hurt people’s feelings. I remember that not so long ago I was telling myself that I must be myself and let people accept me for who I am but I think those words did not sink in until now.

Even since 1997 I have made a tradition of purifying my soul during the month of October. This is the time when I have made the hardest decisions in my life but at the same time I have cleanse my aura from all the toxic relationships, friendships and bad habits that have kept me anchored. October just passed by yesterday and it was another exciting month of self awareness and discovery for Vanessa.

The most important thing that I pondered on during this month is to distinguish between the people that are my friends, my family, my loved ones and those who are acquaintances, relatives and people that I know or used to know. Being in this environment where I am forced to befriend the people around me—since there are no others to talk to—makes me rebel against the notion of being pleasant, proper and approachable. It almost pushes you to tolerate things that you would not tolerate under normal circumstances.

Overall, it was a painful and translucent month for me. The truth sometimes hurts but at the end, the truth is all that matters and it really set me free; free from the ball and chains that I tie to myself because I think it is the best way to get by. I am ready….

Making a change???

It has been a long two months without writing anything here, or anywhere for that matter. Many things have happened and my attitude has changed dramatically since the last time I wrote here. Being in this environment makes one wonder about the future and if we will ever collect the fruit of our efforts.

About my efforts…

I have worked relentlessly to make a difference and for once in my life I can say that I do not think I am making a difference here. The people that we work for seem to agree with what we suggest, nod their heads and continue to do things the way that they see fit which 97% of the time is the wrong way to do business. I will spend the next few posts explaining some of the things that have drove me to think differently. Here is the first one:

• Accountability
  I do not think there is a word in the Iraqi language equivalent to accountability and if there is one--or maybe two--they have made their best to forget the significance of it. Property here comes and goes without ever being accounted for hence there is no accurate estimate of what we do or do not have in the regiment. For example…
  
  Let’s say that we had a few new Chevy pickup trucks within the regiment and they were dispersed equally to the different companies for the commander’s use. Then, let’s say that two of those trucks disappear from the area, what you think would be one of the first questions made to the people who signed for those trucks—the responsible party as we call them in our country.
  
  Under my command, one the first things asked would be: What is the serial number of the trucks unaccounted for? Well, apparently that would be a much too difficult question to answer around here because—as I heard from one of the commanders here—why keep serial numbers? If you have 5 donkeys, then you have 5 donkeys,…it does not matter which donkey you have…
  
  Fabulous! So, in the case presented above, there is no precise way to identify those vehicles because they just do not keep track of serial numbers. I guess it will be quite a circus to go out to town and look at every Chevy truck that drives by--friend or foe; that is the Iraqi way. So, you would think that would be a story that would deter them from not keeping all the information they would need in case of the disappearance of equipment, right? Oh no!!!
  
  I spent a whole hour with the commander I work with trying to explain why we should have 100% inventory of all property—equipment--in the company. At the end of the conversation he was still not convinced that it was necessary and I resolved to make him do it against his will. The problem is that because he does not see the purpose, he will not continue to do it on his own and the result will be the vanishing of—yet—more equipment that has been financed by the US government and consequently by yours and mine tax dollars….

Would that make you lose the enthusiasm of being here?